Sunday, April 20, 2008

The Scruffy Feeling [11/17/07]

Baldness runs in my family. I used to blame it on my uncle, who would always rub it in that I was losing my hair, when he himself was balder than the eagle on the Muppets. It started losing it when I was about 19. I remember my senior college picture, and how the photo editing staff put a cloud around my thinning scalp to make it look normal. It looks funny to me now.

Back in the spring of this year, I had my hair cutter begin to slowly prep my head for shaving it all off. I would go back every three to four weeks, and he would take it down another step. When I finally made the move towards the 'bowling ball look', he took it all off. I noticed how scruffy it still felt. He used the electric razor, and it only got so close.

After a few days, I took out the hand razor and some Edge gel, and went crazy. I remember I wanted to have that tough effect for the kids I worked with. It felt so smooth. I have had it off since.

A couple night ago, my wife and the baby were asleep. I had been working on the computer late. I wanted to shower before hitting the sack. I thought, "Man, I feel scruffy." So, there I was shaving at midnight, the face, and then the head. As I was trying to get that baby soft feel, I started thinking how liberating it was not to have to use shampoo anymore or the need to get a hair cut.

Liberation and a shave. I wonder what it is like for God to wash our sins away, to be made "white as snow".

I have been a born again Christian for most of my life. I am not perfect either...actually, quite far from it. Something about the Holy Spirit working in me at midnight, while I am shaving my bald head, making it balder, that tells me God is still at work in me.

I know that feelings are not an accurate barometer of the health of my soul, but I know I am alright in God. He is just like that, you know? He gets your attention sometimes in the least obvious manner, when you are caught off guard. He nudges at your heart. He nudged at mine while I was shaving.

There is a lyric in there some place...

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